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Why the Met Gala Sucks

NEW YORK, NEW YORK - MAY 01: (L-R) Anne Hathaway, Jared Leto, and Salma Hayek Pinault attend The 2023 Met Gala Celebrating "Karl Lagerfeld: A Line Of Beauty" at The Metropolitan Museum of Art on May 01, 2023 in New York City. (Photo by Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images for The Met Museum/Vogue)

As I sat on the toilet and scrolled through Instagram today, I saw all of the celebrities I follow to see how good they look in a bathing suit had a party last night. For those of you like myself who didn’t even know this event was happening, it might be easy to forget just how ridiculous the Met Gala is. The event is literally a fundraiser for the Metropolitan Museum of Art and their Costume Institute. Basically, the event is for the richest people in the world to give money to a museum to display some fancy clothes. I can’t even pretend to know about the fashion world. I’m currently wearing grey sweatpants I bought in high school, and I often leave the house in them. But this event is so pointless, and the amount of attention that it receives annoys me beyond belief.

I think that if the annoying side of Hollywood gets to spend way too much money to play show and tell, we should give the fun side the same right. Have Bert Kreischer host, and let his imagination run wild. Encourage everyone to pregame the event like its their senior prom. For example, think of the only time that the South Park guys were nominated for an Oscar, and showed up to the red-carpet tripping balls. 

This is the type of behavior this night would be built off of. The guest list should include Dave Chappelle, Snoop Dogg, Charlie Sheen, Jennifer Coolidge, and most rappers to name just a few. If the person has never made a movie about smoking weed or had a public drug problem, I don’t want them. Give Mike Tyson high as giraffe balls and put a microphone in his hand. I don’t know, I’m just spit balling here. What I do know, is this event would be incredibly fun to watch, and probably even more fun to attend. 

I think a hypothetical event like this shows why the Met Gala is so ridiculous. It is irresponsible to spend this much money on an event, and downright disrespectful for a night this expensive to be no fun at all. If they get to do all of this in the name of a charity that helps no one, let the drug addicts do the same for a $1,000 donation to charity each. Some good will come out of it I’m sure. Let these rich drug addicts have their fun, and let the public benefit from the ensuing hilarity.   

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Written by TFM

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