Woman Slips on Prosciutto, Sues Italian Supermarket for $50,000 in Damages

A plate of cured pork; capocollo, prosciutto and salami at Taluca Park free range farm in Exeter, Australia, on Thursday, Jan. 14, 2021. Australia's economy is recovering strongly and sentiment and hiring consistently improved in late 2020 as authorities managed to bring the virus under control. Photographer: Brendon Thorne/Bloomberg via Getty Images

I hate to be that guy, but how do you slip that badly on Prosciutto? I have so many questions. Was it a full block of Prosciutto or was it sliced? I feel like this has to be fake. A slice of Prosciutto is so paper thin that it would probably just stick to your shoe if you stepped on it (trust me, I’m Italian). 

Even if I broke every bone in my body slipping on a piece of Prosciutto, there’s no way I would try to sue. Once you become the “Prosciutto lady”, there’s no going back. This woman will forever be known as the chick who somehow figured out a way to seriously injure herself by accidentally stepping on a piece of fine Italian meat. I hope the judge sides with the Prosciutto, in all honesty. 

The supermarket chain that is being sued over this incident is called “Eataly”, with this Prosciutto slip-up occurring in their Boston location. I have not personally been to the Boston Eataly, but I have been to the one in Chicago. Let me tell you, this place is heaven on earth. I’ve never been in a supermarket quite like it. The quality of food sold there is unmatched and they have an entire level of restaurants where you can devour a delicious meal while getting wine drunk. I will forever stand with Eataly. 

I don’t see an outcome where this lady doesn’t get any money from the lawsuit. $50,000 might be a stretch, but Eataly is going to probably have to pay a decent penny for this rogue piece of Prosciutto. However, life will go on for the supermarket chain. Unless someone dies after tripping over a wheel of Parmesan.

Written by the godfather

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