7 Hours Of Jungle Juice…

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At TFM, we love sharing the insane debauchery that our followers experience during their nights out. Unfortunately, not every crazy story can be communicated through a 20 second Instagram video. These are the stories that happen when you are too incapacitated, that is too crazy at the moment to whip your phone out, or legally require anonymity. Please enjoy… 


Woke up with my back hurting having no idea what time it was or where i was. Looked around and realized I was in a closed container. Confused and still drunk I pushed on one side and the top opened. I slept in the bed of a truck. I hopped out to get blinded by the sun at its peak. Realized I was about a block away from my apartment and walked home. A girl watched the whole thing from the opposite sidewalk. It was noon. The truck owner could’ve driven away at any point that morning and I could’ve woken up in the back of a moving truck. Luck of the Irish I didn’t. What a night.

That girl must have a lot of questions


I got an ambulance called on me for eating cheese. During move-in weekend my senior fall semester, my fraternity was going to have the obligatory party. To pregame for it I went to my rugby team’s darty. We were drinking for about 7 hours and before I left I filled three water cannons full of jungle juice and took them all. I went back to my chapter house and blacked out. I was told in the morning I got the cops and ambulance called on us. I went into the fridge and started eating queso fresco (the crumbly cheese in Mexican food) then fell onto the floor of our kitchen. I also was doing the shoot while on the floor. The crumbled cheese in my mouth mixed with drunk flailing made it look like I was having a seizure. When the ambulance showed up my brothers were explaining that I was eating to which I walked out there and offered the ambulance workers some of the queso fresco.

This sounds exactly like what would happen after drinking Jungle Juice.


Spring break in Fort Lauderdale. A group of 10 of us went skinny dipping in the ocean at 2 am and one girl got stung by a jellyfish. As we’re back up on the beach completely naked trying to help her, we see a beach patrol car moving down the beach from a half-mile away. It was pitch black out and none of us could find our clothes in time. We all ran naked back to the house as the beach patrol car put its spotlight on us. The girl that got stung by the jellyfish somehow made it back and had to go to the hospital after.

What kind of pussy needs help after getting stung by a jellyfish? Be a man and have your bro piss on it.


On an eleven-hour plane ride, flying back over the Atlantic, the airline offered free beer and wine. After 3 IPAs and a couple of bottles of wine, I popped a xan. Got up to stumble my way to the bathroom and I ended up falling directly against the rear door of the airplane. Waited there still leaning against the door for whoever was taking their sweet ass time in the bathroom. Once they vacated the facilities I immediately puked my guts out. Don’t remember anything else from that flight.

That is the most occupied a bathroom can get

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