I have around a baker’s dozen of thoughts every single day. Many of these happen every day, and are entirely influenced by what is swinging slightly protruding between my legs. One of my thoughts today was that a lot of men probably think the same way I do on a daily basis. Here are six thoughts all men have each daily.
“Should I go to the gym today?”
Apparently, a lot of guys answer yes to this question every day. I’m not one of those people. Every man does ponder going to the gym daily. It’s just some go and workout, while some go back to bed and/or do their own forearm workout at home.
“Sydney Sweeney would really like me if she gave me a chance.”
I might not be the guy from Top Gun who called off his marriage after filming a movie with her, or the guy she is happily engaged to. Despite this, I feel like if she gave me a chance, we would be happy together. I also think that most men have this thought once or twice a daily when their routine of work/school/self-pleasure gets slow.
“If I took *insert sport* more seriously, I could’ve gone pro.”
This often happens while in school or at work. We’ll think about the only touchdown we ever scored in our youth, and build that into an alternate life where we share the Madden cover with Patrick Mahomes. Snapping out of this daily day dream is the worst part of every day.
“I love women.”
Every day, every man sees something that makes him realize how much he appreciates the existence of women. This has only grown with the rise of social media.
“I hate women.”
Every day, every man goes through something that makes him realize how much he resents all women. This increases for men in relationships.
“I earned this.”
This one can apply to anything. Whether it is a beer, a bowl, a DoorDash order, or anything other vice you absolutely did not earn, every man treats themselves to something on a daily basis. Or at least they should.
