TFM
The internet had a field day this weekend as people across the country were hitting each other on video. If there is a man with a fetish for watching people get hit in the face, he’s probably the most tired person in America at the start of this work week. Throughout the weekend, there was semi-professional boxing, a historic baseball fight, and plenty more. Here are the best fights from this past weekend, going from worst to best.
Jake Paul vs. Nate Diaz
My shin got into a better fight with the living room coffee table than the one these two put on. Anyone who still makes an event to watch these needs to wait for their thirteenth birthday, or evaluate their decision making. Jake Paul is yet to put on a good fight. As long as he is challenging washed up UFC fighters, this will remain constant.
The Bears’ Water Balloon Fight
I didn’t consider this to be a fight, but I considered it to be more of a fight than Jake Paul and Nate Diaz. Also, Justin Fields isn’t putting any of his accuracy concerns to bed with a water balloon any time soon.
Jose Ramirez vs. Tim Anderson
You know when people say, “There’s going to be two hits. Me hitting you. And you hitting the ground.” Well those people suck. Regardless, that’s exactly what happened in this fight. Baseball fights are typically represented by big movements, loud yelling, and minor shoving. This was definitely not the case in this fight. Jose Ramirez went onto the Mt. Rushmore of baseball punches with this one. Without bending his elbow, andwhile being held back, Ramirez turned the lights off in Anderson’s head. This fight was so good I want Hollywood to make a biopic about Jose Ramirez with this punch serving as the emotional climax.
Dock Security Race Brawl
I laughed at this for so unbelievably long. This incident comes with several different camera angles, and a plot that develops overtime. In other words, this fight turned into a feature film. It starts with a group of white people jumping a black security guard who told them they had to move their boat. Soon after, a huge group of black people make their way down to the dock to beat the whale off their Vineyard Vines shirts. It devolves into utter chaos, lasts way longer than you’d think, and ends with people getting thrown into the water. It might be the best fight video of all time, and the quickest I’ve ever abandoned my race.
