Kylie Jenner and Timothee Chalamet are officially dating after being seen kissing at the Beyonce concert last night. At least that’s what they want you to think. These two are way too robotic to actually be dating each other. Their PR teams simply just agreed that they were the right level of beautiful for each other. Don’t believe me? Stop reading this and go watch all eight seasons of Entourage.
Now that you are aware of the trials and tribulations of public romance through the greatest movie star of all time, Vinny Chase, you likely see where I’m coming from. If relationships are hidden for good press, it’s no stretch that they would be created for the same reasons. After months of rumors of the two, “Keeping their romance private,” they are suddenly being very open with their love life. Seems fishy, no?
The video has been all over the internet today. To me this seems planned. Jenner and Chalamet decided they would vulture each other’s popularity. Since Denis Villenueve was too smart to put Jenner into the Dunefranchise, they had to create a new way to combine their popularity. This was done through well planted rumors, and choreographed intimacy to a Beyonce show, which is probably an aphrodisiac for the Kylie Jenner’s of the world.
If you don’t believe this to be true, just watch. I’ll call my shot and predict the media coverage of this over the course of the next few months:
- They will go back to their, “private lives” for the next three to four weeks before appearing together in public again.
- In about a month, they will be seen eating lunch together at some place that charges the black market value of your liver for a caesar salad.
- They will go to the same tropical island together whenever their schedule lines up. Probably right before the Dune marketing pitch.
- At this point, they will start answering questions about each other in the media. It’ll sound cheery, but it’ll be well rehearsed.
- Around, March, it will be announced they are focusing on themselves, but remain friends.
This isn’t a stretch. Couples don’t typically check to see if a camera is watching them before kissing each other.
