Naked Man Arrested For Dancing On Poker Table

(Photo from @networkinvegas on Twitter)

Las Vegas is a crazy place. Yet, Vegas during the World Series of Poker weekend is a completely new type of wild.

I literally just finished writing a blog about four women who started a massive brawl in the middle of the Encore casino last night. As soon as I posted it, I got a fresh alert on my Twitter feed that read “naked Long Island man arrested for gyrating on Las Vegas poker table.” Obviously, I had to share the story with you all.

Truth be told, I’m a tad late to this. It all went down on Sunday night, but despite being over 24 hours old, I feel as if it is my duty as a TFM blogger to share any and all naked dude fight stories. So here it goes.

What happened?

Late Sunday night, a man by the name of Brian Danilczyk from Long Island, NY was arrested. As the name of this blog suggests, he was indeed fully nude during his arrest. Brian’s escapades began at around 11:20pm. At the Bird Bar located in the Flamingo Hotel, Brian was seen punching a man who only had one leg. Pretty coward move if you ask me. Even more cowardly, Brian ended up fleeing the scene before cops arrived.

It didn’t take too long before police caught up with him, however, finding him later in his nude state on top of a poker table in another hotel. Honestly, I could tell you myself what happened, but I think it’s funnier if you hear it from the official police report.

“Danilczyk was seen by security and CCTV footage removing his clothing at the LINQ Hotel,” read the police report. “He ran completely naked through to Harras Hotel & Casino. Danilczyk had climbed atop a poker table and flaunted his genitals to all who passed, exposing his privates while ‘gyrating.’” 

I love how they put gyrating in quotation marks as if it’s a hip new dance move like “the whip” or “flossing.” Wait, the report gets better.

As security was getting ready to escort him out of the casino, “Danilczyk then changed his position to expose his anus to all who passed on the main floor.” That is straight out of a police report. Only in Vegas would a legitimate court government document read those words.

The outcome

Now, I know what you’re all thinking. Yes, there is a full length video. Here it is, you’re welcome.

Also according to the police, Brian allegedly has no memory of any of this happening. Cops say he “was in an altered mental state” yet remained “cooperative” while being arrested. They went on to say that “he did not recall the encounter.” According to FOX 5 Las Vegas, Brian was booked with disorderly conduct, battery and five counts of indecent exposure.

Clearly, this guy was on something. My guess is some form of ecstasy, but I am confident that he was more than simply plastered. You don’t willingly show the entire world your holes and just not remember it. The only way that happens is if some sort of fairy dust got into your system. That said, it is possible that Brian was given fairy dust without knowing. I mean people get drugged all the time. It’s scary, but it’s unfortunately true. I don’t think most people who get secretly roofied end up in jail for indecent exposure, but there’s a first for everything.

If you’re as curious as I am as to what led to this, don’t fret because Brian will get his chance to explain himself in court. He is due in court August 17. I cannot wait and will update you all if I hear anything more.

Alex Becker

Written by Alex Becker

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