The Optimal Penis Size According to Women (and Science)

If you’re a guy (and have a penis), you’ve undoubtedly had at least one moment throughout your life where you’ve wondered if the size of your “johnson” is ideal when it comes to pleasing a woman. As I continue on my summer dry spell, I had one of those exact moments today while I was showering. To paint the picture for you all, I’m a 5’9” white guy who wears a size 9.5 shoe. Pretty average, if you’re catching my drift. But, sometimes average isn’t a bad thing. Sure, we’d all like to be in the top one percent of anything that actually matters, but being average is way better than being at the bottom. 

Speaking of averages, the standard erect penis size for a United States male is 5.35 inches, 60th among all countries. While the typical American can’t compete with the Ecuadorians (6.93-inch average), at least we aren’t as bad as the Irish who boast a whopping 5.03-inch average. While I found these statistics online earlier today, I realized that “good” or “bad” penis size is incredibly subjective. To a dwarf – or little person I should say – 5.35 inches might be too much. But, to Candace Parker, 5.35 inches might appear to be what scientists call a “micropenis”. 

Thankfully, the University of California and the University of New Mexico completed a study in 2020 that asked a group of women to report their preferred erect penis size. As you could expect, the “little guy” came up short (no pun intended), with the ideal penis size averaging out to be 6.3 inches in length and 4.8 inches around. However, for one-night stand situations, women tend to prefer a bit larger than that, choosing a penis with an average of 6.4 inches in length and 5 inches around. 

If you’re not quite up to standard – don’t worry – you’re not alone (unless you happen to live in Ecuador). As long as you know to avoid certain turnoffs in the bedroom, you should be alright even if you’re working with a less-than-desirable toolkit. Like a wise man once said, “It’s not about the size of the boat, it’s about the motion of the ocean”.

Written by the godfather

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